:-)

Whether it's $10, $25 or $50, the extra fee to check a bag at the airport sucks!

If you are flying with a friend...this is like a gift from the gods...






















It's two suitcases in one! So you don't have to share the actual inside space!



http://www.bagking.com/Merchant2/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Product_Code=8350115&qts=pricegrabber&qtk=8350115

Pick Of The Night 5-20-09

Looks like Lala can't keep up with me :-)

Check out tonight's pick here:

http://www.myspace.com/brettdennen

Let me know what you think of Brett Dennen's "Ain't Gonna Loose You."

Tinted Windows...

We've been playing a song called "Kind Of A Girl," from Tinted Windows...

Now...

If your brain is imploding over the surreal-life-esque cast of the band...

Here is a program-guide to the group, and a semi-educated guess on how they happened upon each other :-)

Vocals-Taylor Hanson (Hanson)
Guitar- James Iha (Smashing Pumpkins)
Bass- Adam Schlesinger (Fountains Of Wayne)
Drums- Bun E. Carlos (Cheap Trick)

Hanson and Schlesinger met in the 90's and became friends...

Schesinger and Iha co-owned a label (Scratchie Records) and are friends...

Both Fountains of Wayne and Smashing Pumpkins have played with Cheap Trick.

There you have it...

:-)

Pick of the night 5-15-09

Too new for LALA...

Let me know what you think of the new Regina Spektor, "Laughing With!"

http://www.myspace.com/reginaspektor

heather@q985fm.com

Mid-week Medicine :-)

Dogs make everything better.

I love my cat, but let's face it, he's a terrorist.

Dogs, on the other hand, are better than the last 2 Advil when you're PMS-ing on a cross-country-road-trip.

Dogs make me happy.

No...

Giddy.

Today, for example, in the blue-flicker-blink of an eye...

My computer crashed.

It was bad my friends..."Bad," to the tune of the IT guy saying, "This is bad."

But then...

I found this:

Yup.

"Suryia," the oran-utan & "Roscoe," the dog...

BFF's...

In the true sense. Not the Paris & Nicole way.

:-)

Scary...or Awesome? :-)

I can't decide whether I love or hate this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uCyKcoDaofg

Pick of The Night 5-08-09

How do you feel about the new Daughtry, "No Surprise?"

http://www.myspace.com/daughtry

Pick Of The Night 5-4-09

Too new for lala :-)

http://www.myspace.com/jessiejamesmusic

Let me know what you think of "Wanted."

heather@q985fm.com

:-)

NE Plates :-)

Next month will be my 2-year anniversary with the state of NE.

I love Omaha.

Omaha rocks pretty hard...

But...

Our custom plate options are...

Pathetic.

Especially compared to other states:

Now...

In 2011, we all get new plates!

Not a vast array of choices, like most states...But I'll take it!

Go here to vote:

https://www.nebraska.gov/survey/licenseplatecontestsurvey.php

You've got until Sunday!

Pick Of The Night 4-30-09

Hello friends!

My lala service doesn't have Cage The Elephant's, "Ain't No Rest For The Wicked," yet...

Sooooo...

Here's their myspace link if you'd like to check them out!

Let me know what you think:

http://www.myspace.com/cagetheelephant

Crazy!

James Kuhn painted his face every day for a year!

These are my favorites:

There's a shrimp/barbie joke in here somewhere...

I've been lazy...

Bottom line...

But the following, has jolted me out of dormancy:

Yes...this, my friends, is Australia's Miss Universe finalist.

5'11, and apparently 108 lbs...

Kids...don't try it at home...and stuff

LOL

Sometimes...Kids make me laugh :-)

Twitter

Hello friends,

In case you were thinking those 25 hours a week we spend chatting + This blog + Myspace + Email is an incomplete equation with far too few variables...I just joined Twitter :-)

My name is:

HeatherQ985

XOXOX,

-H

Screw "I love your eyes..."

In 2002, I moved...

into a crappy college apartment complex where I battled daily for a parking slot.

After most of my belongings were successfully stacked into an 8x10 bedroom, I retrieved the last item...

The 1980 red MGB project car, which was/is/always will be my preferred form of transportation.

I am attracted to small topless cars, because it's easy to feel reckless and unfettered behind their steering wheels...It's almost as though a 4 cylinder engine is strapped to my desk chair, and I can fit anywhere...quickly.

In just that fashion, I pulled up into an almost impossibly small spot. A guy with gaged ears and an electric guitar, who has since become one of my dearest friends, stopped and waited until I manually secured the canvas top and opened my delightfully creaky car door. Ignoring the pomp and circumstance of "Hello," he said, "Short Skirt Long Jacket...by Cake...I think they wrote that song about you."

That, my friends, was the most incredible complement I've received...up until today.

This was sitting in my inbox:

You are fast approaching the title of funniest person with girl plumbing I have ever heard...Don't stop talking.

Thanks :-) That will sustain me for at least 8 years...

XOXO

-H

:-)

Concert venue port-a-potties, I am no longer your slave!

Have you seen this:

http://www.go-girl.com/how-to-get-gogirl.asp

It's a collapsible funnel so women can avoid sitting on toilet seats!

The Go-Girl:

Oh MSN...

MSN has a list of things NOT to share with your co-workers...

-Intimate details about your personal life

- Breakups/divorces

-Hangovers/Wild weekends

-Blogging or social networking sites

-Gossip

Hum...

I think I break every one of those rules EVERY night.

Oh MSN...

Silly Rabbit.

LOL...Thanks Dan

Song: Just Read Heathers Blog
By:Dan Dan the Napa Man

Where is the moment we needed the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
You tell me your blue skies fade to grey
You tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carryin' on
You stand in the line just to hit a new low
You're faking a smile with the coffee to go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces everytime
And I don't need no carryin' on Just read Heathers Blog
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
Just read Heathers Blog
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
Just read Heathers Blog
Just read Heathers Blog
Well, you need a blue sky holiday
The point is they laugh at what you say
And I don't need no carryin' on
Just read Heathers Blog
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
Just read Heathers Blog
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
Just read Heathers Blog(Oh.. What a Great Blog..)
Sometimes the system goes on the blink
And the whole thing turns out wrong
You might not make it back and you know
That you could be well oh that strong
And I'm not wrong (ahhh...)
So where is the passion when you need it the most
Oh, you and I
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
'Cause you just need to read Heathers Blog
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
Just read Heathers Blog
You've seen what you like
And how does it feel for one more time
Just read Heathers Blog
Just read Heathers Blog(Oh, yeah, yeaaah, yeah)
Read Her Blog(Oh, Read Her Blog)
Just read her Blog(Oh, yeah, yeah, yeeeeah)
Read Her Blog(Oh, Read Her Blog)
Read Her Blog...
Just read Heathers Blog...

Lowering the divorce-rate is Anti-American

I just read an article about our friends in the Sunshine State...

Apparently a group is lobbying to abolish the "No-Fault" divorce.

I understand that these people can see a potential utopia through their rainbow goggles...But...Come on!

Am I being extreme when I say that making it more difficult to divorce will severely affect the economy?

Think about it...

Fewer divorce lawyers employed...

Real estate agents and moving companies missing out on relocation assistance fees...

Childcare workers, out of work because both parents together can handle their kids.

Las Vegas tourism down, because fewer people are willing to hop on a plane for a fun-quickie-marriage-weekend.

Dating sites yielding fewer membership fees, because fewer people are single.

Restaurants & bars gaining less income from "Dates."

Gym memberships down...Why look hot if you hate your mate? Being out-of-shape is a great punishment.

Wedding planners, caterers, churches & other ceremony centers, bridal party attire providers, florists, printing centers and mobile DJs/Bands all feeling the heat...If it REALLY is forever...fewer people are going to take the plunge.

Therefore...

Lowering the divorce-rate is Anti-American.

Match.com Days 10-11

God reportedly created the world 6 days, then rested.

My Match.com world has been created in 9...

I will now rest indefinitely...

Until further events warrant commentary...

You have your cast of colored characters...

:-)

ORANGE is getting jealous...

Earnest wants me to remind you that it IS all about him:

Match.com Day 9

I have received email from you, and feel that I should make the following clear:

1. It's not that I NEED/WANT a date or a boyfriend. I'm window shopping. If I happen to find someone fabulous...wonderful...I could have just as easily met said fabulous person in the grocery store. (Yes...grocery store romance did happen to me...Once-upon-a-time.)

2. Because you're on this shopping trip with me, you're apartheid to each and every passing whim. I am, in fact, an impulse buyer by nature. But remember...I'm comparing these guys to shoes and socks...both of which are semi-often replaced.

3. I'm doing this because I'm not often single. I am right now...Therefore I can. I have also eaten ice cream for breakfast/slept all day/worn pajama pants to Walmart...because I can. Nothing but old fashioned decorum is stopping me, and I sold that for a dollar. I'm a product remember? I exist solely for your amusement.

4. Match.com is not paying me/throwing me free stuff.

I may add to this list...But please know that if you see insecurity in-between-the-lines...It's contemplation. I'm thinking out loud. (Then typing...LOL)

Match.com Day 8

Hello friends...

I am happy to report that RED, isn't as awesome as I initially suspected.

He is a real person and no longer a flawless profile.

Don't get me wrong...

This is good news...

If the movie lasted 15 minutes, replete with the fairytale ending...no one would buy a ticket.

Plus...It's my job to be the awesome/flawless one...

LOL...

I'm going to hang out with RED again next week...He may be stopping by to play in my studio at some point as well :-)

Match.com...Day 7

I am currently in the throws of a Match.com IM conversation, with someone who shall remain colorless...

So...WHITE?

I can never remember if WHITE is the absence of color, or BLACK...

Regardless...

I have momentarily turned into a more manipulative version of myself...

I have reverted to the 21-year-old, I have 3 dates in one night, Heather.

Momentarily...

WHITE/BLACK is so enthralled by the intrigue that surrounds my lack of conversational engagement, that he is attracted to "The Mystery."

Said "Mystery" does not exist.

I'm simply answering his questions in the least personal way possible.

I forgot how that makes guys feel the good-kind-of-crazy.

Is it possible I have forgotten "Flirting 101?"

Yes...

Yes, my friends...it is.

Match.com Day 6

140 people have viewed my profile a total of 495 times.

That either means a little more than 3 visits per viewer...
Or...
One person has viewed my profile 356 times and 139 have seen it once...LOL

Either way, the exposure level is phenomenal.

Plus, I'm a big fan of the point and click "Dear John" letter.

Speaking of rejection...

I am an active officer in the Grammar Police Dept.

It's semi-hypocritical, as I'm certain my blogs contain several mistakes...

However, anyone with "ALOT," appearing in their profile is out...No questions asked.

I'm anal.

A

lot

anal.

Match.com Day 5

To recap:

RED: Trophy BOY
BLUE: Artist

I have been corresponding with a third specimen named GREEN.

GREEN is environmentally conscious/HGTV friendly/College student.

GREEN has the most attractive profile. Nothing other than "Nice Guy," jumps out at me...

Maybe that is just what I am lacking...Simple. Nice. Man-Friend.



I have plans to meet RED on Wednesday...Expect a full report :-)

Match.com Day 4

I realized something today...
This is the first time I am blogging in real time.
Generally, I have several hours or days between an event and an entry.

Therefore, these entries are more diary-esque...
MORE real than reality TV, I suppose...

Let's talk about BLUE...

BLUE is an artist. If you've read previous entries, he is "The Sock."

There are several reasons why I like socks...

They're comfortable, warm, and it's difficult to see my life without them...

I have people like BLUE in my life already.

I have dated people like BLUE in the past.

I understand and appreciate BLUE...without even really knowing him.

That, my friends, is why he is, "The sock."

My fear with BLUE, is that he and I are too similar.

Friends, don't get me wrong...I'm not an artist.

However, both of our passions require...well...a great deal of passion.

Passion is wonderful when it is...and horrible when it isn't.

And I have always know it to have an expiration date...

Match.com Day 3

Friends, if you made it though the yesterday's uncertainty and emotional complexity, I salute you.

Shopping IS the easiest way to describe this experience.

And because I like shopping and boys it's an easy comparison :-)

Now...

For the purposes of this Blog, I will refer to each profile owner as a color.
(I thought about assigning numbers or letters to differentiate them...but there is really no ranking system. One isn't better or worse, higher or lower in my opinion, than another.)

Let's start with RED.

RED is the $600. pair of shoes I made reference to yesterday.

RED is the eye catching trophy-boyfriend type, who APPEARS to be mentally stable and semi-perfect. Committing to the pursuit of RED would be like committing to buy the $600. shoes.

I'm not convinced RED is a good idea...much like, I would never jump into buying $600. shoes.

Yet, I am still standing in the store sans credit card...pondering RED.

RED is the type of guy whose attractiveness demands the immediate credit card purchase.

If I don't do it, someone else will.

RED will not last here on Match.com

What am I waiting for, you ask?

Two words...

Buyer's remorse.

The inherent trouble with a credit card purchase.

It's risky.

In the several months it would take to determine whether or not my impression of RED is correct, I will be making payments on the emotional investment.

There are really only 2 possible outcomes:

1. The $600. pair of shoes, RED, become a wardrobe staple and worthwhile lifetime investment.

2. I am three months in, broken hearted, with a pair of shoes too tattered to wear and still costing me money.

*Sigh*

Tomorrow we will talk about BLUE, the "Socks."

Match.com Day 2

I feel like I walked into a high-end boutique without my credit card.

I have twenty-eight dollars in my pocket, so I can afford a pair of socks.

I can't decide if I want to come back for the $600. pair of shoes, because it's winter and if I wore them, they'd be destroyed.

Plus, the $600. pair of shoes would cause me less stress in 6 months when I have saved for them.

But what if those shoes are gone in 6 months?

What if 6 months from now, I am ready for the shoes in every way...but someone else is wearing them?

Would that upset me, or would I find a different pair I like equally well or better?

So here I am...pondering over the socks.

Wondering why I'm here...

Because the sign above the door says, "Find what you're looking for."

And I didn't realize "Finding," had to be the point of "Looking."

Day 1...Match.com

As promised, consider this the inaugural MATCH.com blog.

There are several foreseeable problems thus far:

1. I don't know if it's rude to ignore people. Do I need to politely respond to all messages?

2. I am not "Looking for love," which is the MATCH.com slogan. I am simply browsing the selection of Omaha bachelors.

3. I was originally rejected twice...Yes, friends, TWICE before the kind folks at MATCH.com decided I was fit to participate. This bothers me a little...As I don't view myself as any more "Unfit," than any other single person.

I am however, enjoying the process...

The cute boy, who originally caught my eye, has responded...

Therefore...

The $34.99 is worth it...For now :-)

Awesome

I'm a big fan of pet accessories.

This made me smile:

Yes, my friends...

It's a bird diaper.

The "Flight Suit," allows your bird to fly around the house without making a mess!

Now...I just need to procure the following:

1. A bird

2. A Flight Suit

3. A straight jacket for Earnest.

Pick-Of-The-Night

Hello Friends!

Just in case you miss a Pick-Of-The-Night, I'll be posting them on here!

Email me what you think about the songs!

Heather@q985fm.com

If Orange juice straws were the grail...Vern Troyer would be holy

I feel like the person who feeds the ducks in the park, and tells the same story at the same time on the same bench every day...

"Back when I was in school, I used to walk 30 miles through 75 foot snow drifts..."

"Back in my day, when a head of lettuce cost 10 cents..."

"When I was a kid..."

Yadda

Yadda

Yadda

But seriously...

When I was in elementary school, we used to get cartons of milk for lunch. 25 cents for a mini carton of chocolate or vanilla. I remember peeling one edge apart, pushing the corners down, and squeezing my thumbs together to reveal a perfectly shaped drinking spout. The mini milk carton...sublime in it's simplicity.

Fast forward to 2009...

Orange juice is now available in a mini carton...Same shape...Same design...Engineered perfectly...

However...2009's mini orange juice carton comes with a mini orange juice straw.

I suddenly feel conflicted.

Aren't we supposed to be "Green," in 2009?

Aren't we above shoving mini orange juice straws from mini orange juice cartons into landfills?

Why does the original mini carton need an accessory?

I posed the previous questions to Polychonopolis, who is wise.

He told me that short people who don't know the alphabet might spill the mini orange juice onto themselves if not for the mini orange juice straw.

That explanation made sense at the time...

Yet...

"When I was a kid..." My contemporaries and I never spilled milk from the mini milk cartons on ourselves.

So the problem still exists.

Even Earnest finds the situation perplexing...And HE is an expert on all things orange.

High Wycomb or BUST

I just read one of those warm and fuzzy stories...

And unless you are allergic to cats, or recovering from some freak accident...like say, tripping over a whisker into a litter box...this will make your insides fuzzy with delight:

A team of firefighters in the UK saved 6 out of 7 cats trapped in a burning house, then resuscitated them using oxygen masks designed for babies. One of the men from the High Wycomb department said, "We were told about the cats and ran around the house in the thick smoke trying to locate them all."

Hum...

If Earnest and I ever become expat's we're heading to High Wycomb.

I missed you!

It's sooooo good to be back!

Over the holiday, I got my cute and fluffy fix with Sebastian, my mom's dog:

Fast forward through four 10,000 calorie days, and 2,000 miles...

The second I walked into my apt, Earnest jumped into my suitcase...Apparently he wants to go with me next time:

Dear Mr. Doppler, I don't fancy you...

I'm flying home to VA on the 24th...

I'm extremely worried...

Guess why...

Yes, my friends, that black line displays the approx. flight path...

The blue/green/yellow/red is the snow...

*sigh*

The fact that I am far less attractive when sneezing...is unfortunate

Several years ago I opened up an account with Blockbuster.

I arrived home to an email from one of the employees...(He'd snagged my info from the registration sheet.)

"Blockbuster Joe," as he would come to be called, became a fixture in my circle of friends. He even dated my best friend, Allison, for several months.

These are the things that happen to me.

This is the way my life works.

There is no reasonable explanation for any of it.


Today, after putting up a worthy battle, my coughing/sniffling/sneezing won and I went to a doctor.

I say "A Doctor," and not "The Doctor," or "My Doctor," because I don't really claim one...I'm not sick often enough to warrant that type of a relationship. I generally just call around and see who has 15 minutes to spare on my snotty self.

However...

The doctor I stumbled upon today...My doctor :-)...is the type of Foxy that makes me want to me ill more often...

*sigh*

I need a "Blockbuster Joe--Doctor Version 2.0"

Earnest VS Ernest

For months, I was proud to tell friends about Earnest's fame...

"If you do a google image search for 'Earnest cat,' my little orange explosion of joy will pop up...

What more could a mother want?

Well friends...

There is an interloper...

And his charm rivals that of MY Earnest.

THIS Ernest does not spell his name with an "A."

THIS Ernest wears contact lenses:

Yes...

Contacts for cats!

I am willing to suppress the Dina Lohan in me, and acknowledge that this is a cool cat!

Ladies and Gentlemen...

We have...Piano.

The events leading up to the acquisition of said piano are strangely, "Movie-esque."

Not "Big Fish," movie-esque...

More like, "You've Got Mail..."


Yesterday morning I did not have a piano.

Today I do.

The details in-between have everything to do with luck or fate or God...
However you want to look at it really...

Oh...

And a guy named Brad...and Brad's wife.


Because there is a level of intrigue surrounding the 1920's piano now living in my living room...I think I will leave it at that..."The events of the last 24 hours are interesting...Certainly irregular."


After all...


Earnest and I never claimed to be "Regular."














































Yes...The mannequin legs are on top of the piano...

This MAY constitute PDA...

Because I have a number of "Regulars" during the hours of 7pm-midnight...

My nightly time with you is a lot like "Cheers."

If you call more than once, I know your voice.

If you've won something, I'll remember your name.

If you LOVE a band, I'll seek them out because I respect and appreciate your passion.

Even if you never call and you're quietly reading this, please know that I'm honored to spend my nights with you.

As we approach Thanksgiving, I want to convey my thanks to you.

There is nothing more thrilling than sharing stories, sprinkled with music, with a cherry on top
:-)

My friends, I call you "Friends," and I mean it.

The Facts...

I scream like a girl.
I can run faster than I thought.
I can run and scream at the same time.

I know this because...

I have a bat in my apt.

I'm re-writing the song,

"There once was a lady who swallowed a fly...I don't know why she swallowed a fly..."

It shall now be known as,

"There once was an cat named Earnest-pie...Please, for the love of God, eat the damned bat."

The Break and Repair Method

I have been told that my entries "Meander."
So in the interest of the ADD afflicted constituency, here is the upshot:

The Break and Repair Method are amazing.

Truly.

The business side of my ear seeks to compare their sound to another artist's music...
I can't.
The Break and Repair Method creates an amalgamation of sounds so complex, that their talent exceeds the capacity of my mental Rolodex. They are completely new and fresh...yet feel familiar.

I stood outside the Slowdown last night, discussing the aforementioned with a newly recruited fan.
We walked in.
We walked in to one of the most musically satisfying experiences of our lives.

I am fond of many bands.
I am a "fan" of several artists.
But...
I am certainly a champion for The Break and Repair Method.

Friends...
They are THAT good.

I have a 49 minute interview to edit...Feel free to buy "Milk The Bee," while I sort through the audio :-)

XOXOXO,

-H

Earnest, as you know, is my favorite.

Bottom line...

Favorite ________ (Fill in the blank with anything fuzzy and and happy...)

I don't bestow the title of "My Favorite," on just any orange person...

That's why the story below made me cry...

I can't imagine what it would be like to have my "Favorite" misplaced...

From: OregonLive.com

Thursday night, as the Kosten family was at Portland International Airport waiting for a connecting flight to Southern Oregon, a Horizon Air employee delivered devastating news:
Janel Kosten's beloved 6-year-old blue heeler, Bear, was missing. For reasons that aren't known, a baggage handler opened Bear's kennel while military jets were taking part in a noisy exercise overhead and Bear bolted. Kosten, who rarely went anywhere without Bear, was crushed. The pair even traveled the 3,000-mile Alaska-Canadian Highway together a couple years ago.
"It's not like a regular dog," said Gary Kosten, Janel's dad. "That guy was her life."
"She was devastated," he said. "Everywhere she would go she would take the dog. This trip, she didn't have to take the dog but he goes everywhere with her. When he came up missing, I felt so sorry for my daughter because I know what he means to her."
This morning, after four days out and about on his own, Bear was found. Details of his discovery are sketchy. But PDX officials said he's been reunited with Kosten, 29, a nurse who lives in Alaska.

More:

http://www.oregonlive.com/news/index.ssf/2008/11/dog_that_escaped_kennel_at_pdx.html

Like Sands Through The Hourglass...Orange is the color of my life...

Every year I attempt to make pumpkin pie from scratch...

Friends, be assured that the "Attempt," portion of the previous statement has everything to do with finding time and nothing to do with ability.

This year, I most certainly had time thanks to my assistant Earnest.

Earnest truly puts the ASS in ASSistant. He would also put the TAN in AssisTANt, but he is orange.

And...

Let it be known that Earnest is, and was, under the impression that because he is the same color as pie filling...He is an expert ASSistant.
















Earnest angrily inquired, "Why-ever is there a candle in my pie crust? Do you propose I cook by candle-fire? How am I expected to produce under these less-than-optimal circumstances?"

















"I see that this fruit has not been properly cut and cleansed..."
















...

Fast forward 3 hours...

...















Ladies and gentlemen...

We have pie...

Earnest requested that I discontinue my "Camera brandishing," until after the pies were done...He apparently feels that if "Duke" (From the Bush's Baked beans commercials) found out our secret pie recipe, there would be "Chaos in the streets."

If I had a penny for all the "Nice Legs," comments I endured today...

Jack's Mannequin indulged a dorky/artsy side of me today:

Yes, my friends, mannequin legs signed by Jack himself...LOL

Now...

My homework for the weekend:
To hang them from the ceiling of my apt. as though the other half is peeking from my rooftop ;-)

;-)

PSA for boys...

The following conversation occurred last week:



Caller: Why does my girlfriend drag out arguments? It seems like we go through the same thing over and over and over again...

Me: You're not telling her what she wants to hear...I don't care what the problem is...Say the following in no particular order:
You're right.
I'm sorry, I was wrong.
I love you.
What do I need to do to make this ok?/What can WE do to fix this?

Then DO whatever she wants/expects. You will if you love her.

Caller: Why are you women so complicated?

Me: We're NOT! I just gave you a script of what to say in ANY situation!

Caller: You're right, I'm sorry, I love you...

Now...

Maybe I'm atypical, but when I engage in an argument every second of it is an opportunity for the recipient my anger to make everything ok. I wouldn't be talking to the person if I wasn't HOPING they would say what I needed to hear. (The above.)

EVEN when my tolerance has expired, and I can't talk to the person any longer...(Days, weeks, months, even YEARS could pass...) A grand gesture would immediately impact my opinion of "Our Future..." However, the more time that passes, the grander the necessary gesture.

A perfect example:

My ex Boyfriend failed the first portion...He was angry and confrontational...

Days after talking ceased, I went to Virgina for my best friend's wedding...If the guy in question had ditched work and jumped on a plane to surprise me at the reception, I would have taken him back...No question...No arguing...In a heartbeat...

It has now been almost a month...

At this juncture, if he performed a grand gesture...Such as flowers delivered every hour on the hour for every day we have been apart...(Not just flowers. Yellow Roses. My favorite flower.) I would quite likely forgive him and live happily ever after...

Now...If you're reading this (Guys) thinking:
Wow, that's a lot of money...
Wow, She's a high maintenance chick...
Wow, I would NEVER do that for a girl...

Then you don't love the person.
Maybe you have never been in love.
Being with someone for the long term, means you would do anything for them...You'd give your life for them...If you can't spend a couple grand on flowers when you've screwed up, you're not invested or in love. Bottom line.

It's not about the money or the time...It's about happiness...

Happiness is priceless.

I want to be the person that provides my boyfriend/husband with something priceless.

So show me I am priceless to you.

Celebrity Costumes ;-)

Here are my favorites so far!

KellyRipa as Sarah Paylin...

Katy Perry as her idol, Freddie Mercury

Gwen Stefani...Our favorite fertile goddess...as herself ;-)

I guess Lance put on the wrong costume...

Terry Hatcher's Queen of Hearts was far superior to my 2006 rendition:

ebay Addict...

I have to hand it to ebay...

For those of us who may not be athletically inclined...

The online superstore really give you that "Winning," feeling...

Mr. ebay...If you're reading this...

Please consider implementing some sort of "Cheering" or "Clapping" sound effect...Thanks.

My latest acquisition:

Scroll down for the back-story :-)

"Orange" has evolved...

Even though nothing rhymes with "Orange..."

I'm convinced anything is possible...

Here is the genetically enhanced version of Earnest:

What's so great?

How could THIS cat be superior to Earnest?

My friends...

The frat guys were correct...

Beauty IS a light switch away...

Mr. Green Genes glows in the dark ;-)