Friends, be assured that the "Attempt," portion of the previous statement has everything to do with finding time and nothing to do with ability.
This year, I most certainly had time thanks to my assistant Earnest.
Earnest truly puts the ASS in ASSistant. He would also put the TAN in AssisTANt, but he is orange.
And...
Let it be known that Earnest is, and was, under the impression that because he is the same color as pie filling...He is an expert ASSistant.
Earnest angrily inquired, "Why-ever is there a candle in my pie crust? Do you propose I cook by candle-fire? How am I expected to produce under these less-than-optimal circumstances?"
"I see that this fruit has not been properly cut and cleansed..."
...
Fast forward 3 hours...
...
Ladies and gentlemen...
We have pie...
Earnest requested that I discontinue my "Camera brandishing," until after the pies were done...He apparently feels that if "Duke" (From the Bush's Baked beans commercials) found out our secret pie recipe, there would be "Chaos in the streets."
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